There's something wrong; There's something amiss; There's something out of place. The heart strings that stir and the cacophony of noises in the head. From a beautiful lushous spring there came the draughty winds of autumn. How fickle is the balance of the emotions when a single expression of a thought-as light as a feather-can tip the delicate balance of the heart.
You saw how I talked to you every night: The laughter and the sad times too. But there was only one wish I had. I wished it upon you that you could talk back to me. That as I narrate the daily dramas of my life. Be it mundane or spicy; jovial or depressing. You were there all the time.
Yet, you spoke no words or gave no consenting nods. You gave me that usual smile and a loving pair of hairy paws. You stood mute witness to it all. How do you endure all that?
We slog through our daily lives searching for happiness in this World of discourse. How messy is the politics between me and you? How superficial is the human judgement when placed against perception. Can there be no genuine and sincere hearts that beat within the crowd- Like the warmth of a nice blanket that keeps us refuge from a chilly and windy night. Move forward and not backward, that we do, as we pursue each of our individual happiness.
Alas, the image of the bus comes to mind yet again. The slow bus ride that we all boarded and eargerly anticipate it's terminal destination. We never could tell whether we've reached it or not. Just we constantly ask ourselves this question when we awake from our slumber be it in the middle of darkest night or at the break of dawn: 'From whence we came, and whither are we going?'
The people that boarded the bus I greeted with smiles and we talked a great deal. But when people grew close the heart grew fonder, contrary to popular belief. When it was their time to alight from the bus that promised to deliver me to my true destiny, I could do nothing but wave goodbye with bitter tears and aching heart. For it's a process I'm so familiar with right now. But then others came when people left. To what end do I open my heart to pain and hurt? An affliction that is the only constant in this cruel game of life. To what end I wonder... to what end?
To my dearest bear. You are indeed my bestest friend of all. For you always accepted me for who I were even though I knew your feelings and views were fabricated from my own imagination and through my dearest wishes. But despite all this... as a silent witness or perhaps a silent guardian. In hugging you and telling you those boring stories and daily dramas. I love you with all my heart.
But if you are truly me and I, truly you... Then the mute bear knows that he is no bear at all. Just a wish I kept dear and secret. A wish that failed and scarred the heart. For each time I take a look at you i ask myself when this bear's life will come to an end?
A wish so simple and naive. Perhaps... It was never meant to be.
It was a sad day today... =(
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