Pinpoint strikes

Sometimes we feel uncomfortable because the people around us seem to be doing things differently from us. Just like during the mugging period when we see people study day/ night and do many crazy things, that it drives us crazy and makes us doubt ourselves and ask ourselves if we were doing it enough or doing it right. It gets a little frustrating sometimes having these doubts and feeling so afraid... I mean... yes... I am afraid that I am doing things wrong; afraid I will be getting bad grades; afraid that I will see failure yet again.

I've seen my share of Cs in my university life. At first I couldn't believe it, partly because of my pride: back when I used to see have the A grade come so easily. But things are different now and I come to realize that hard work is important!

I used to feel insulted when people said I worked very hard (I have to be honest). That was because I felt that people thought I have no substance/ talent and only relied on being a closet mugger of sorts. But I realize how foolish I was, because I am proud to be hardworking =). Just this semester, someone I met for the first time said I was the 'most hardworking person' she ever met haha. Ironically, I never used to be hardworking and only really started last to this semester.

There is no shame to say that I am weak. In fact I want to say that I really ain't very good at school at all. I have not seen an A grade whatsoever in my entire 2 years in NUS. But that doesn't mean I just roll over and die or give up trying. I can't match up to the raw talents and abilities of those around me (and truly they are impressive and so multi-talented that goes beyond mere academics); but I will try to close this gap in my own way and with my own diligence and understanding of myself. That in itself is what it truly means to FEEL ALIVE for me...

We are all fundamentally different, and that means we have different strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, no one way of doing things works for everyone and I have to maintain the strength of my will to resist doubting my own methods. Truth be told, I think people will be shocked at how slack I am for preparing for my final exams... but to myself:

The key to me is and always will be: Minimum effort maximum output... Because I know my own capacity and am patient about progress. Hard work and true effort that will never lose to anyone will come only at the right moment; pinpoint strikes I call it that will help make this semester REDEMPTION from my past failures... Determined as ever!