A Last

I realized I've been blogging a lot lately, and that's definitely not a good sign. So I'm going on a hiatus and stop this incessant blogging less I attract too much attention. It's quite funny though I find it. If I really didn't want people to see things, why the hell do I bother using analogy after analogy and post them on facebook? Because the truth is I hope whatever I type, to who it may concern, will see this and the feelings and emotions channeled =/

I wish I didn't have to face it everyday. Because ignoring it just ain't helping very much, but facing things straight on ain't exactly the best way to do it either. I think I should stop taking things so personally. I learnt by now from words and from people I am over-enthusiastic and that does not go well with most people unfortunately =/ I feel like I have irritated people for awhile, but I don't know what other way I should react because I'm just trying very hard to be myself =X

I've probably exerted a lot of pressure on people when I ask them why certain things happen... Zhao Mian... You know people don't like to answer whys right? T.T Imagine if you were them then you wouldn't have liked it either. Certain things are just answers that need not be sought. Everybody knows it, so why bother making life difficult for others and at the expense of getting a wound even deeper than it already is.

I've said so much and this will probably be my last post for awhile... Don't see a point being secretive...

So I decided to lock myself away only to realize I felt really depressed. I'm so selfish because I really wanted to make friends and along the way I probably omitted the feelings of the people I wanted to befriend. Not everyone wants to be friends.

The time I've met everyone can be counted within hours; when there's nothing to say there really is nothing is there? Don't bother trying to make something up to converse when there really isn't anything; and most importantly don't be an invader and act one emo because people will feel bad =/

Even when I'm very emo... Very upset. And seeing faces brings stings I must pretend that nothing is wrong and the episodes are over. That way is when I am not selfish anymore... and when I say I WON'T TRY ANYMORE then FREAKING MEAN IT!!! I'm so disappointed that I still am so persistent... I'm disgusting =///