Friday, July 10, 2009

Fragments of Past Tense Pt 1: The Awakening

Fragments of the memory bound to keep... refreshing insights read and weep... What forgotten now revented... May the fragments rejoin and rekeep...


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For in this hour of darkened flare... Sunk to bottom held so dear... Resist errosion of time and space... A cry so silent in the dark... Shattered dreams of smitherines... I see myself within your pain... For again the hour of darkened flare... pass the fire thus ignition... awaken dormant cells neurotic... Let us see, let us hear... let us... witness things so clear... Let us unlock the binded sun... Let this bondage be undone... ...

Let us visit memories deep... let this memory now released... ... ... ... ... ...

A trip was planned for 6 yet strangely in the weirdest of scenarios there were only 3 left. Decided to move on and continue the trip. Watched a scary movie. He spoke of someone dear to him... about his worries of that person in trouble. Did not treat the question seriously initially but then in the end I guess I did. Didn't think much of it... But haha never thought he would have such a 'soft' side too hee hee... Left an impression of him in me... Didn't really noticed him even though we had been working together under so many projects... Ironic of course...

The next night went online when I was bored and I saw him... I guess no one else was there to talk to... So for the first time I said hi and asked about that someone haha... Had a few laughs and started to well know him... but then again memories vague now but knew we enjoyed the chat... probably because both of us no one else to chat with also haha... As days went by we chatted daily on MSN... Starting to enjoy it... I guess he was the first male friend I treated well much like a good friend within a short duration of days... Heard his chronicles of interacting with that someone... Haha gotta admit I was smiling to myself when he said those things. But yea I tried to give advice about things I know about girls... Hope it helped... Started spending more time online and looking forward to each chat... First time top scholar go online so frequently too haha... That's a first. Exchanged blog links with him... Quite honoured to have gained access to his blog and first impression of his blog was it was damn cool haha...

Of course inquisitive nature made me explore his blog links and I sorta knew his friends through there though on the surface. Seems he was an interesting guy too... Weird maybe... But funny too... And then it was the time for him to go overseas to Korea the land of kimchi. Said our goodbyes,I remembered I was in school doing banni study duty then and he was packing things at home... We both prayed that someone will rmb his departure yet sadly... When the moment came when I was drafting my farewell msg to him and sending to ppl to make sure send at actual departure time he suddenly messaged me and told me his departure was made early and he leaving already and that that someone never responded... Knew he was sad and I felt worst... I guess that was the first time I cried for someone, when I never even cried for myself at all then... Felt anger and sadness... didn't know what to say... just could say hope he cheers up and I will miss him lots and lots while he was away... Felt sad afterward but I knew he went Korea also on a mission to get XXX as I adviced haha...

His departure marked the awakening of something in me... For everynight while he was away I wondered to myself how he was... Felt lonely for the very first time... I remembered several occasions when I will come online and stay all night wandering aimlessly in cyberspace... feeling so empty... It was a fact I guess that I missed him a lot... Never thought it would be that bad... And it was during that period of loneliness I started feeling he was my best fren... ... Told some of my golden frens about it and they were quite shock that Zhao Mian actually finally have a best fren who is A GUY and within SO SHORT a period... But I convinced them... He really is the best fren I never had... ... ... I told them... much to their intial shock though... ... I love him...

To be continued...

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